Recently a big change has happened in my life. A decision, an idea, that had been floating around in my mind for a long time. You just know when it’s your time to move on and for me, that time was well overdue. Having worked a the same place for the previous 12 years I had reached the age of 37 almost 38 and time for change was upon me. If I stayed where I was and it was still open then I could be 50 and have progressed nowhere in my life. At that age, it’s difficult to make the change then but I feel at 37 the opportunity is here for me now to better myself, provide a better life for myself and my family.
It nearly didn’t happen though I changed my mind at the last minute and decided I was going to stay where at my current job, I mean that’s just the fear of the unknown kicking in really isn’t it, the fear that where you are going you might not like it and the very basic fear that it’s outside your comfort zone, is that who I wanted to be really? The guy who just stays in his comfort zone all his life, just doing enough to almost get by? As it turns out no, it’s not who I am and to be honest, 4 weeks later I’m sitting here writing this happy with the choice I made.
Some people may say it’s only a job but with it being something you do every day for 9 hours it’s a large part of your life, my (now) previous place of employment changed me on a personal level. I found myself being very bitter and to be honest in general, not a nice person to be around, very judgmental and short-tempered, I know deep down that is not the person I am it was not the person I was before I joined.
After being away from there it is clear that it was not the person I actually am, I feel happier now, more content with who I am. Something else that played a big part in my life was gaining back a lot of the weight I had worked so hard to lose years ago. I was using food as a coupling mechanism for the struggles I was experiencing that’s for sure.
My previous employment involved me delivering things in a van, which of course allowed me to stop into the local shop or if it was lunchtime call into any of the local fast food places. I don’t run to the shop or food cupboard 90% as much as I use too, the change of scenery has been a breath of fresh air, all my old habits are going away slowly as I don’t rely on them to get me through the day, I’m sitting here thinking about what needs to be done at work tomorrow with a new vigor in my attitude, a newfound passion for my work and hope for the future.
Just another tequila sunrise, starin’ slowly ‘cross the skkkkkyyyyy.
This blog was started roughly a week ago on the subject of earworms. An earworm is a song or tune that you randomly get stuck in your head for no reason and then seemingly can’t get rid of it. Well, thanks to my own idiocy the song this blog was going to be about is now stuck in my blooming head again. aaahhhhhh!!
It was a cloudy but warm Thursday morning and as the first drops of consciousness make their way into my mind I hear it. The unmistakable sound of the seminal 70’s band The Eagles. As I stand in front of the mirror brushing my teeth and co template g the day ahead there it is again.
The words that this blog started with come seeping Into my mind and as unconsciously I start to sing along to the soft rock vibes of the classic tune it never occurred to me that this would last all day long.
Driving to work, dealing with customers, having lunch, driving home no matter what I do this song still plays over and over, constantly it’s catching me off guard and the words start coming from my mouth. Heading to bed after a long day it finally passes and sweet sweet slumber beckons me.
So thanks past me for not finishing this post and inflicting me again with ‘The Eagles’ disease.
The moment when the realization hit me that writing is something I really enjoy doing, the idea popped into my head of treating myself to a new laptop. That way I could keep all my blog entries and short stories etc on it and when I had the time or inspiration I could pop open the laptop and start writing. It didn’t actually turn out like that in the end though.
Originally I had been sitting down at my desk and using my computer for all my writing duties but that was starting to cause a wee problem in the house as my main keyboard is a gaming-based one which uses mechanical keys which give a loud click every time a key is pressed so with that being too noisy I thought that the laptop idea was a pretty good one.
A good nice laptop was ordered and when it arrived I carried it with me everywhere ready for that moment to pull it out of its fancy bag and write something truly brilliant. What I found actually happening more and more over time was that I would start any blog or story idea I had on my phone and thanks to the cloud I could pick back up where I left off at home (Once everyone was in bed and not being annoyed by the constant ‘clack clack’ of the keys) and the laptop was getting used less and less. Lying unloved and uncharged in my car.
This experience has taught me a valuable lesson! You don’t need anything fancy to enjoy writing all you need is a bit of inspiration and a bit of time, even if its 5 minutes here and 10 minutes there.
As a teenager I always liked the idea of reading, as a kid I used to love reading books but in my teenage years, I drifted away from them. I found myself in my 30’s falling back in love with books and it has been a whirlwind romance. Now though there are a few cracks starting to appear. I find my eye being caught by another.
At my jobs, I do a lot of driving which leaves a large space for listening. Normally this would be filled with podcasts and music and hmmm…. I Don’t know……..er ……. bird song maybe…….but the temptress who has drawn my affections is nonother than audiobooks. Thanks to a free trial I got with one of the larger audiobook sellers they have become an addiction of mine now. I find myself going through whole series of books whereas I would be lucky to have the time to get through 1 book a month.
Sorry books but my head has been turned and I’m starting a new life with my new love.
Every year I come to the same conclusion! I won’t go through this again next year, I’ve simply had enough, you won’t do the same thing to me ever again!
Then the rumors start up again and my interest starts to rear its ugly head. Whenever a spare minute comes my way its back to my phone to check what’s happening now with them. Checking to see if there might be a chance of something different this year, maybe a change in attitude or some inkling of desire from them to be the best they can be!
But inevitably when it all starts again in August, my hope is there that this year it will be different, this year they won’t take me for a fool but no, I know, they know, that this year is going to be filled with some highs yes but mainly will end with a disappointing slump!
Oh, the life of an Arsenal Fan! Will I ever learn!
I had always considered myself a retro gamer. You can usually find me in my spare time reading articles on old video games or watching the countless videos posted to youtube daily about the subject. Rarely however do I actually play older games. Sure there might be a night where I would sit at my computer, fire up Launchbox ( Launchbox is a front end for cataloging and showcasing the games you have on your computer that you can then launch them from here using the required emulator) and spend more time looking through the various games of all the numerous amounts of game systems.
Maybe I would play 5 – 10 minutes of one game before switching and playing something else. But this past week there has been a change, I have been off work for a week after a minor operation and to take my mind off the pain and discomfort that comes with surgery my companion at night time has been the Playstation 2 version of Grand Theft Auto Liberty City Stories. I have sunk so many hours into this wee gem this week that it has become my main form of entertainment. It helps that it is set in the glorious 1980s so all the music that plays in the game automatically improves it straight away.
2 Kids, a wife, and a dog in the house mean I have very little game time set aside and I would usually play something quick and easy to put down. Recently my go-to games have been mainly racing or fighting titles. It feels good to get my teeth sunk back into a branching single-player story again. The fact that it’s an older game that I initially missed out on is a bonus, how many other games have I missed in the past that are sitting there waiting to be enjoyed?
So does this show that my gaming habits are actually changing or will I revert to my old ways?
All I can say is at the minute the older stuff will be keeping my attention for a while longer yet but time will tell!
Startled awake, my eyes darting about trying to see something in the pitch blackness of my bedroom. Unsure as to what has awoken me I hear it moving outside the door. My body automatically tenses. I notice that I’m holding my breath as my ears become ever more aware of my surroundings.
As I struggle to make sense of what exactly is happening suddenly #Creak# A floorboard is squeaking in the hallway, closer now than before. whatever it is, it’s coming my way it’s coming for me. My heart is rocketing out of my chest now, cold sweat is running down my forehead as the horrors of what could possibly be outside, beyond the wooden door, starts to run riot in my mind. Surely if I run I could make it to the window, yeah I might break an ankle but the fall isn’t that far. Its worth it compared to the fate that lurks on the other side of the door.
Then it happens, my body now on full fight or flight mode as time slows down. Loud banging footsteps are echoing through the house they are getting faster, this thing, this beast is now running, running towards me. Then ……..the door handle starts to turn I jump up on the bed. Concerned as to why my dog is still asleep. Shouldn’t you be helping protect me in my time of need? With a rush of air, the door slams open. Frozen, my mind a blank I stand on the bed and look in horror as …………………………………..my 3-year-old child runs into the bedroom. ………In my half waking stupor, it slipped my mind that we have 2 kids ….. Oh well, panic over.
Wow, it’s been a minute since I posted anything. Life has taken over and that has left very little time for writing anything. My short stories or novels or books, whatever they turn out to be, have all been put on hold too.
Been dabbling in the video game streaming world more recently. It’s odd but I do find it really enjoyable which I didn’t expect, not sure what I expected though
. Sure at the minute I’m streaming to 2 or 3 people at most but if you treat it like your being watched by thousands then as long as your having fun that’s all that really matters.
Been a minute since I posted a wee blog update, so here is one to keep you tied over ’till the next proper one. I’m sitting on my lunch break snacking on some Nestle Smarties and writing a short story that is tentatively titled ‘er……help’.
It’s a sci-fi based story but set very much in modern-day reality just with a few differences, our protagonist wakes to find…………………..actually nevermind you can read what happens our intrepid hero soon enough. If it took as long to read as it does write then I would beat Stephen King on book-length. That’s always the worst part about writing for me. I type something, think about it, re-write it then read it again. I probably spend too long thinking if that last sentence sounds perfect rather than just getting on with it and keep going! Ahh, I just did it again! Some of you are probably thinking ‘You should have spent longer on everything, its all crap, but to those people, I say thanks for the views and I don’t mind if you hate-read as long as you keep coming back.
Due to a rather fortune set of circumstances, I’ve ended up with a new laptop totally free! I won’t bore you all with the details but this lucky accident should allow me to be more productive. Or at least allow me to up my Youtube viewing!