5 months ago my whole life changed immeasurably. My spare time has now gone, no longer can I come home from work and mindlessly watch a film or play the Xbox, my every moment is occupied by the events of those 24 hours.
It was a cold but exciting January morning. There was light frost receding across the grass at the stupidly early hour I found myself walking towards my car. 45 minutes earlier as I lay in bed half awake half dreaming my phone sprung to life. As odd as that would be on any other morning so early, it was the call I was anxiously expecting, with a slightly groggy head I answered and so began this…….. adventure?………yeah I guess we could call it that.
What unfolded on that memorable day will stay with me for the rest of my life. It occupies my every waking thought. For years I had a fear that it would be too much for me to deal with, could I really handle it. Could I handle all this grown up responsibility, me a man who still feels like a teenager in his head. Well I suppose most men still feel like a teenager. But no its been 120 days now, all those fears have subsided and been replaced with other more terrifying ones, but that’s for another day, another blog.
The car rumbles to life, my heart beating like never before. I have never been as nervous, scared and excited all at once like this before, well except for when Grand Theft Auto Vice City came out. Travelling along the road, only a handful of other cars about this morning, my mind kept wandering thinking about where those people were going, were they heading to work or maybe going to the shop for the papers, coming home from a big night before ? This massive day in my life and for them its just another mundane boring day.
I arrived at my destination, nervous and excited all at once. The car park was empty, I hadn’t seen it like this before. Normally there are hundreds of cars all vying for spaces. But there was a calmness in the air now, suddenly a wave of that same calmness washed over me. For months I had wondered how I would feel and now it all suddenly felt ‘right’.
In that moment a realisation occurred to me,’I’m ready for this’ and once again the excitement came rushing back except this time it was just the excitement, none of the worry or self doubt just the sheer bliss I felt knowing that in a few hours the past several months of concern and anguish would be over and that they would be it, and boy were they worth it!
I hurried along the corridor trying to remember how to get to the correct room. Gathering my thoughts and tempering my giddiness I asked the receptionist which way I should be going. Heading through an electronically controlled set of double doors I spotted it. Finally after all the years of thinking about this moment, through that door, past the curtain, in a few short hours, in this room I would actually meet the second love of my life.
I would meet my son, my baby boy Riley!