February is upon us now and for everyone else that is fine and dandy, a normal thing but it scares me quite a bit though.
Ok so I am exaggerating a tiny wee bit there, perhaps nervous, anxious, and excited would all be better adjectives to use. Being February means that my second child is due Next Month!!!
Our first baby Riley has just had his second birthday, the last 2 years seeing him grow and develop has been a life-changing experience, one that has changed me as a person, on a deep level. To be perfectly honest I knew certain aspects of our lives would change forever and while I was totally fine with them, happy in fact, the changes have been immense and, you know something? I wouldn’t have it any other way.
When you first child comes along nothing truly prepares you for what is in store, sure you can read books, blogs and watch all the youtube videos you want, but until you experience parenthood you just never know. Until you experience the immense lack of sleep the first few months, not to mention the whole nappy changing scenario or the whole explosive nappy situation where everyone involved needs a bath afterward, being a father is a roller coaster, one once you clamber aboard you never want to leave!
Even though I started this blog saying the opposite, this time around I feel more relaxed about what’s ahead of us, of course you worry about your partner, worry that she and the baby will be perfectly fine when all is said and done but the actual looking after and caring for another human being part no longer fills me with the uncertainty and trepidation I felt 2 years ago.
The past few mornings have been quite eery. Where I live has been covered in a deep fog and as a gamer I can’t help think back to the Silent Hill games and to a lesser extent the movies.
There is something hauntingly beautifully about the world being obscured by a deep grey fog. There’s something terrifying about it too, somehow I think that’s thanks to the aforementioned horror series.
More like words lost. I use the WordPress app to write (shock) and have a tendency to start a story or write an outline and with it being 2018 and all just assume that the app has saved the draft.
Of course checking this would be wise but who has time for that now adays. Good smart people that’s who, which is why I never check and several times now my drafts have decided they didn’t want to be saved!
To all those words and paragraphs that were lost I’m sorry. No doubt you were amazing and a true loss to the English speaking world.
…….. without a dope beat to step too! No more Timbaland lyrics for the rest of this post, that I promise!
Well, my last post was a fair wee time ago! Time has passed as it has a tendency to do and things have somewhat stayed the same. Well with one exception, we are having another baby in March. When Baby No1 came along I had all these great ideas of what Fatherhood would be, those went out the window quickly!
Time is the biggest thing we seemed to have lost when gaining a child. By the time I come home, get dinner and put the young-un to bed, I’m too exhausted to do anything else. Gym, writing, everything else has taken a back seat. Now don’t get me wrong its the best thing in the world being a Dad but it is a hell of a life change and one that I’m sure has hit many other Dads and Mums the same way.
Mrs G and I had started to think about a holiday or a breakaway but with Baby 2 on the horizon, we have shelved that idea for a while. The baby has always been on our minds but moving house and looking after baby 1, the upcoming arrival has always been a ” Oh yeah that’s right” kind of thought.
Now that its 2018 and I sit here on New Years Day, I can’t help but feel so excited for the madness to come in March. I’m prepared this time, and even though I don’t like the term new years resolution, I have a couple of let’s call them goals set out rather than resolutions.
Look after my health better than I have been.
Actually set aside time for the gym.
WRITE MORE, even if its just a simple small piece. WRITE MORE
Oh and all that family stuff blah blah!
Writing these posts or even stories I’m working on using my phone is just a pain in the backside so I have refurbed a laptop from a couple of broken old ones that Ill be taking with me everywhere for when the ideas for these rubbish posts or stories enter my mind. (I really could do with this being waterproof for the shower).
This may not be a masterpiece of literature but It has got me back on the wagon/ on the horse/ off the wagon??? I’m not sure which of those is correct so pick one to suit yourself.
See not another mention of Timbaland, well apart from this line.
It started with one line. ‘Memory is a funny thing’, looking through some of my unfinished blog posts and this one in particular jumps out of the screen and grabs my attention.
Not because it it was an amazing insight into the human brain no, it caught my attention because I had started writing it, got one line completed, obviously thought to myself I’ll get that finished up shortly and promptly forgot it had existed.
One day I might finish it or maybe adapt it into another price of writing “wink wink” who knows?!
Just before posting this I found another post with the start of a story I thought I had lost and reading it back I have no memory of writing it!?
Will that one ever see the light of day either? I don’t know……..Now………..What was I going again……????????
Please come back, I promise I won’t take you for granted ever again. Since you left, my mind has been filled with memories of the great times we have spent together. What ever I did wrong , we can work it out.
Sitting here in the dark…….I miss you……I miss your presence. I miss the comfort of knowing you’re there when I need you, when we all need you!
Please come back on again electricity………I’m bored and it’s dark in here!!!
Given that god is infinite and that the universe is also infinite, would you like a toasted tea-cake?
That’s simply one of my favourite lines from one of my all time favourite TV shows. Ahh Red Dwarf, A classic british Sci-Fi sitcom from the eighties, that’s not only still on TV but is also still consistently funny. I admit I probably play the entire series a bit too much and my wife now hates it. I’m convinced if she watches a few more episodes she’ll learn to love it again. She will, won’t she…………? If not I’ll have to teach my son to appreciate ‘The boys from the Dwarf’ At least then she will be out numbered!
One of the many many benefits of being a parent is exactly that. Passing on what you love to you kids and outnumbering your wife on important matters, ok so maybe not that last bit.
My boy is over a year old now as I write this and i can’t wait to share with him my passion for the things that I loved doing as a child and the love i have for things even now at the ripe old age of 36. Gaming has always been a constant in my life growing up. There has been times when Ive drifted away but I always come back eventually. My first gaming system was a ‘hand me down’ Atari 2600 Junior that 2 faulty joysticks. One that didnt go left or right and another that didn’t go up or down. It never occurred to me that this was an issue I just simply played the handful of games we had the best I could. Finally one day I came home from Primary school, sat on the edge of my bed, fired up the 2600 to discover to my delight that the controller now worked fully. Little did l know that earlier in the day my mother had popped out and got me a new joystick. After the Atari we had a NES then a Megadrive that my sister and I would spend countless hours playing games over and over, swapping the controller over if the other got stuck and trying to reach the next level in Alex Kidd.
It’s those fond childhood memories that drive me to make great memories with my son and hopefully my other kids if /when they arrive!
Inspiration is a strange mistress. Sometimes the outline idea for a piece of writing will come to me at the most inopportune times. These mini epiphanies are so prevalent to, well, basically everyone. It has its own nomenclature, the veritable ‘Shower Thought’.
As you can imagine, the name comes from the act of taking a shower( duh) but its not exclusive to that task. Speaking from my own own experience its when I have time to let my mind wander, when there is no external stimulation from tv, radio, people, etc, that’s when your mind has time to recover from the barrage of information we all put ourselves through on a daily basis that you actually have time to think for yourself.
Of course typically you have nothing with you to write down these million dollar ideas and real life soon creeps back into view and these thoughts and ideas slip back into the ether from whence they came, like some cheap b-movie swamp monster, never to appear again ….until you’re alone, naked on a desert island without a pen or laptop and the cycle then starts again.
This blog was thought up whilst Top Gear was on the TV and Mystery Science Theatre was sharing the screen with this blog, so absolutely no inspiration or thought was used what so ever, but hey, I’m writing again and that can only be a good thing.
When an inspired thought enters my brain it vanishes so quickly again. This is the reason I have so many unfinished draft posts. I have to admit that for the past few months I have been bereft of good things to write about. I don’t want to publish boring talky blogs with no humour (like this one you mean – I hear you all say). I’m hoping that even just writing this will keep my mind ticking over creatively so that when the time comes and that bolt of inspiration hits, I will be ready, like a sprinter waiting to launch out if the starting blocks!
As they say in Russia, Moscow………… crap that is the worst joke ever
…..to stop me from writing! As so eloquently put by the irreplaceable Jeff Goldblum in a movie from my youth Jurassic Park. Ok so he didn’t say the second part but the first is all him.
It’s been a wee while since I last wrote a word but instead of writing I’ve spent a lot of time with the family and just reading instead. Mainly Sci-Fi or Auto biographies, while I’m not one for celebrity I do love reading about actors or people who interest me. Recently I’ve read the biography of Robert llwellyn better known as Kryten from Red Dwarf. This has then ked me led to a space theme. Once that book was finished I transitioned on to the classic Arthur C Clarke’s Rendezvous with Rama and followed it up with what I am currently reading, which is Children of Time by Adrian Tchaikovsky.
For the longest time now I’ve had an idea or maybe a better phrasing would be , I’ve had a premise for a short story that I would like to develop into a novel. I have the first major hook outlined in my head and even started to write the first few pages. It has long been a dream of mine to write a book and although it may take some time, years no doubt, it’s something I’m going to push on with when I get the time.
We’ll that just a quick update from me on my absence, until next we meet, cheerio!